My heart is breaking....i dont know what to do anymore

I dont want to loose you.....but what can we do to fix things because i want to real bad i love you with all of my heart

</3

i think im done with xanga for awhile. Theres no point in it really. Im sure ill update some day but for now this is my last entry. Life is good for me right now. The only things that arent good are that im losing touch with my friends. I miss them alot. Ive done this to myself though its all my fault. And also im still grounded i hate it soo much because its not helping my situation any and im doing better on my grades so hopefully ill be ungrounded soon. on another note me n brian are doing amazing our 4 month was on valentines day and he got me roses and took me out to dinner. I love that boy soo incredibly much. well thats all i really have to say

<3

leave me comments they make me smile :)

& she said :: please don't give up on me, just don't let
me push you away, because i've been known to do that.

love is one of those things

that no matter how hard youu try

youu cant find the words to describe

how youu feel inside. <33

its amazing how quickly a broken heart can mend
when it stumbles across the p e r f e c t person<3

i really hope that this works out.
i've never had more faith in anyone.
i've never had more hope in anything.
please don't ruin that.
please don't let it die.

everytime i look at you,
i have to remind myself to breath

I spend 23 hours a day
wondering whether we’re wrong for each other,
wondering whether we've got the energy
that we need to get through
everything that we seem to get into,
whether the baggage we both bring
would sink a small ship.
But in the 24th hour,
I realize I’ve been thinking
about him for 23 hours
and I come back to
there's something about him,
I can’t stay away from.
Something about him,
that makes me want to love him

rite n0w, things c0uldn't get any better between me and y0u. y0u said it y0urself i'm the perfect girl f0r y0u, never g0ing t0 hurt y0u. Why? because i'm the girl wh0se always getting hurt. it's alm0st like its my j0b. s0 please if y0u're g0ing t0 take my heart like all the 0ther b0ys, d0n't be the 0ne t0 break it, keep it with y0u and cherish it. because i cherish every m0ment i'm with y0u. i want t0 thank y0u f0r making me feel like the center 0f the universe. whenever we're t0gether n0 matter if theres 20 people 0r 5 pe0ple there, y0ur attenti0n is always t0wards me. i wanna say thank y0u f0r making me feel l0ved.*

well...

I have a feeling that this will be my last entry for awhile because im going to be grounded....and I hate it because I dont even get to use my frikken phone...its going to KILL ME not being able to talk to or see brian or anyone for that matter im going to do better this semester on my grades because I hate this.....I should have thought about this when I was frikking slacking in school. But hopefully it wont be for long because im going to have good grades and do all my work and turn in all of my shit.

Anyways yesterday was britts birthday HAPPY SWEET 16 BABY I love you.

on another note....im so incredibly happy with brian. I didnt know this could be so real. I love him so much...and to think I was inlove with someone else before him. I wasnt inlove with that guy at all. I didnt even know what love was until I met brian. He treats me so incredibly good. Its like I dont deserve it. He wants to be with me at all times and never gets sick of me. And the same goes for me, no matter how long im with him, its NEVER enough. I use to get sick of guys after about a month but not brian we will be together 3 months saturday and we will be together for so many more months after that. Hes actually a TRUE boyfriend. He doesnt hide anything from me and always tells me if something is wrong. Ive never had a relationship with a guy where i could be soo open. I can tell him anything and everything. He always makes sure that im ok and happy. Im not use to a guy actually caring about me. just about every other boyfriend ive ever had just bullshited me. I love you brian.

I turned in an application at reasors yesterday. Hopefully I get the job. I really need one. Because i have to pay for the wreck I caused and theres no other way I can pay for it. And plus it will be nice to have a little extra money to spend so brian doesnt have to pay for everything lol hmm well thats all I have to say. Ill update when ever im not grounded anymore

I love you guys!!!

<33

comments make me smile please leave me alot so when i come back ill have like 50....

its scary thinking about how much you mean to me
how much i'd miss you if you werent in my [ l i f e ]
and how i get this amazing feeling when im with you
i've never loved someone like i love you baby.
and i cant help but remind you every single day <3

My greatest fear is losing you.
Scared that you will scar me and shatter my heart to pieces.
And just fade away like a long lost memory. Left untouched.
 

I love how i can be a total dork around you
& yet you still make me feel absolutely amazing

WHEN Y0U'RE iN L0VE
+ every day flies by
+ everything is perfect
+ nothing anyone says can hurt you
+ life means more than it ever did before
+ & you realize that without that one peson
you would be incomplete..<3

 

hey...

well its the last day of winter break and im so upset. I really dont want to go back to school. This break has been amazing though. Spending it all with brian . The only thing that sucked was that i didnt get to hang out with some of the people i wanted to cause brian was always over.But its ok i love him thats all that matters lol. hmmm i have to do better this semester cause my grades last semester were NOO GOOD. I dont know what my problem was it was like my grades were the last thing on my mind which it shouldnt be that way grades should be first but whatever. Britt came over last night but then i got introuble and she had to leave

hmm well i dont really have anything else to say right now

<33

leave me some comments please

-- People say you can only fall in love once --
   >> but that cant be right <<
--Cause everytime I see you I fall in love over again--

~~People ask me why its so hard to trust people, I ask them why its so hard to keep a promise~

I love the way you look at me I love how I know
you`ll always be there when I need you to be I
love how complete I feel when I am with u I
love the way I fit in your arms I love the way
you make me laugh I love the way you treat my
friends I love the way your voice sounds over
the phone I love how every time I look at you,
you take my breath away. I love how I thank God
everyday for bringing someone as wonderful as
you into my life I love how you love me
I love you just the way you are

How would you know if he really loves you?
It’s when you scream, he’s calm.
When you slap him, he kisses you.
When you cry, he hugs you.
When you tell him you hate him,
he tells you he loves you

hola!

christmas was good....i got an ipod nano! i wasnt expecting to get much but i ended up getting exactly what i wanted!! umm yeah brian says hes getting me a new cell phone....i dont want him spending that kind of money on me but hes being stubborn like usual...and i cant win this one so i guess ill just have to let him buy me one...hes outta town right now and i think im going crazy...im use to being with him at ALL times and this is killing me.....i already miss him and hes only been gone for like 5 hours lol but o well i get to see him tomorrow night that will make me happy!!! i get to hang out with my lover today (britt) im excited i havent seen her in like a week! well thats all i gotta say

<3

leave me comments to make me feel better